How to Relax the Body, Mind and Spirit

We all now recognise that relaxation is much more than a game of tennis, a walk in the mountains or a hot bath. At the heart of learning to relax is the art of caring for all three levels of our being – body, mind and spirit. 
We are also realising that we have been misled by the mythology of 'get your body right and your mind will follow'. This is the illusion sustained by many of todays ‘relaxation industries’. 
The truth is much more freeing – when we enlighten our spirit (our self), then relaxation follows naturally, and our true peaceful, loving and contented nature is restored.  
This, in turn, is the basis of our mental and physical well being. 
Hence the wisdom in the saying, "rest does not come with sleeping, it comes with waking"!

Stress Is a Messenger

Stress is a form of pain or discomfort which comes to tell us there is something we need to change. The inability to relax anywhere, anytime is a message that is simply telling you there is something you need to learn.

However, most of us have learned to believe some stress is both natural and necessary. This belief blinds us to our need to learn how to change the way we respond to the world around us.

The messenger of pain or discomfort can come at any level - physical, emotional, mental and spiritual. The most common messages that come at a mental/emotional level are anxiety/worry/tension/fear/anger.

If not resolved they will eventually lead to physical disease or illness. Unfortunately most of us mistakenly accept the 'stress experiences' as part of life, and do little to alleviate the pain or discomfort at the mental and emotional levels, until it becomes so severe, even life threatening, at the physical level.

One of the most powerful illusions which keeps us locked in a stressful lifestyle is the idea that our stress is caused by circumstances, events and other people.

As long as you think this way you will always be in self created pain, and likely to be crying 'victim'. 

Some people have been in pain for so long they cannot imagine being pain free, and real relaxation is a dim and distant memory.

So they justify their pain as a natural part of living and then project it's cause onto others. They also tend to convince themselves they are comfortable being uncomfortable, relaxed when they are not relaxed. This is fatal.

Inner Work

To listen to the messenger of pain means seeing and acknowledging our stress as our own creation. It is the result of how we respond to the uncontrolables in life i.e. circumstances, events and other people. No one else creates our responses.

If you can see and accept that you create your own stress according to how you are responding, you will then see that there is something you need to unlearn as well as learn.

The old response needs to be unlearned, and a new response needs to be learned.

This is not an instant process, but a gradual, personal, inner work, over time.

The purpose of a little 'chilled thinking' each week is not only to give you some insightful thoughts to think about, but also to challenge those deeply held beliefs and perceptions which you are both consciously and unconsciously holding on to, and which are the real root causes of your stress and discomfort.

Are you ready to challenge yourself and learn new ways to change your responses to life, the universe and most of all... other people?


Most of us are of sound mind, but many of us have trouble maintaining a note of harmony and peace. Most of us know how to think, but few of us are able to control our thoughts.

We all have the capacity to be creative, to image new ideas, but few of us are able to do it together and co-create in harmony with each other. 

We could all do with some mental training so that we may use the most powerful energy in the universe, the mind, which is always at our instant disposal. We can begin with mindfulness.

It's a simple way to gently help our mind go where it is best to go, do what is the best thing to do. It begins by simply being fully aware of what you are doing.


Mostly we are not fully aware, as our minds wander into the past and then into possible futures.

We spend most of our time watching others and so rarely fully focus on what we are actually doing ourselves. Next time you sit down to a meal, watch your self. Be aware of only what you are eating. 

Every time your mind wants to wander, bring it gently and lovingly back to the action and sensation of eating. Then do the same when cleaning, when writing, when working.

The more you do it stronger and more focused and more rational will be your concentration, the more natural will be your actions, the more peaceful you will feel, and the more relaxed you will be, no matter what you are doing.