How Life Shows Us What We Need To Know

by Dave Richo -

There is a grace-full force in us and in the universe. It is a lively energy that is always at work so that we will become fully human. 

To be fully human is to be as loving as we can be, as free of ego fear and clinging and as generous as we can be with our innate gifts and talents. 

This takes psychological work on ourselves and a spiritual practice. When we are committed to such a program, we feel joy and self-respect because we are fulfilling our deepest purpose in life.

Our ego may balk at this and yet we can discover a path to equanimity. This leads us to dealing with our dark side as well as with fear, loneliness, anger, guilt and hurt. 

Love follows and blossoms into lovingkindness and compassion. In all of this we explore mindful pausing as a central spiritual practice. 

Finally, we appreciate how nature figures in as an assisting force and how wholeness is always and already ours. Then we walk confidently to our sublime destiny.

Practical steps are about doing things in new ways. But doing is not the whole picture. We are also receiving graces that assist us. 

We become fully human not by our efforts alone but also by the assistance of a higher power than our ego that complements our psychological work and our spiritual practice. 

Abundant grace is surrounding us right now and can be trusted to help us cross our next bridge or threshold.


Here are five suggestions that may be helpful in discovering who you really are and in acting that out:
1. Tell those close to you what you feel within yourself and in reaction to them, no matter how embarrassing it may be. 
2. If necessary, allow yourself to retreat from a distressing issue long enough to regroup your strengths. Then come back and face the music with more power. 
3. Stop and hold every feeling, cradling it, and allowing it to have its full career in you. Distractions and avoidances only alienate you from yourself. 
4. Admit your fear, allow yourself to feel it, and then act as if it were not able to stop you. This is how fear turns to excitement about an alternative and how self-esteem increases because you now have the courage to risk. 
5. Always be on the lookout for your deepest feelings, wishes, and needs, and act in accord with them.
Here are some ways to know what these are:
 Free yourself from inhibition and clinging. 
 Ask for what you already know you want and gradually you will ask yourself—and others—for deeper things. 
 Set boundaries in your relationships and you will know a great deal about yourself and your real needs. 
 What makes you happy and gives you a sense of fulfillment? What do you do that flows from blissful choice and what is based on a sense of obligation or habit? 
 Look at the record: the history of what you have actually done in the course of your life tells you more about yourself than the fantasy of what you wish you had done or what you say you want. 
 If you acted with the highest level of consciousness and spirituality, how would your life be different? 
 What people you strongly admire have is likely to be what you want too. 
 What you want for your children and best friends may tell you what you have always wanted.
Respond to each of the entries in the above list noticing which feelings, wants and needs come through most frequently.

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